50 Thoughts You Have As You’re Getting Drunk On Fireball

My relationship with Fireball is a rollercoaster. Have you ever heard of the song “i hate u, i love u”? It’s a little bit like that.

The progression from sober to drunk is one filled with many thoughts, confusion, intense bewilderment. Here’s what’s going on in your head…

1. I’m gonna take it easy tonight.

2. Fine, maybe I’ll go out, but I want to be in bed by 11pm.

3. No shots for me tonight, nope. That didn’t go well last weekend.

4. There’s always that one dude with jorts on.


6. Why did I get Fireball?

7. Why did I think that was a good idea?

8. Oh god.

9. Ok, here I go.


10. Yuck, sticky fireball fingers.

11. I prefer cinnamon in cinnamon rolls not in my whiskey.

12. Alright, it’s not as bad as I remember.

13. How much does it cost to make a bottle of this stuff?

14. Probably not much.

15. I think it’s time for another shot.

16. Ok, shot #2 was better, but I still cringed a little.

17. I’ve had homemade Fireball before but it didn’t taste like this.

18. This is a great song.

19. I wonder what year this song came out.

20. I’m gonna go dance.


21. Alright, shot #3 let’s gooooo.

22. Shit, does Fireball still have antifreeze in it?

23. Oh well.

24. Another great song calls for another shot.

25. My fingers are so sticky.

26. Would Fireball on the rocks taste good?

27. I’m gonna yack.

28. Brb.


29. I’m glad I don’t work in the morning.

30. I should chug some water.

31. I’m not gonna chug water.

32. Did I eat today?

33. This hangover is gonna be a bitch.


34. Probably time for another shot.

35. Ok, but really. Nyquil has the same texture.

36. 6 Shots is my max tonight.

37. How is it already 10:45?

38. Pretty drunk, I should start making vacation plans with my friends and random strangers that will never happen.

39. My body feels all warm.

40. Who’s blacking out with me tonight?


41. Another shot.

42. This stuff is going down like water now.

43. This song is a banger. I should go to their concert.

44. I should tell my friends how much I love them.

45. Why am I smiling at myself in the mirror?

46. Alright, last shot.

47. I’m not a ‘woo girl’ but right now seems a good time to yell “WOOOO!”


48. How many shots is that?

49. Just one more shot for the road.

50. I can’t see.


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